It is good to tarry...

Do we live in such a fast food, microwave society that we do not know how to tarry at the cross?  According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, tarry means

1a: to delay or to tardy in acting or doing

b:  to linger in expectation: wait

2: to abide or stay in or at a place

I grew up watching the saints of the church tarry at the cross.  They took their concerns to God in prayer and they waited there on their knees until He answered.  It seems that now we are too busy pushing through our agenda to tarry on the Lord.  I may not have received my baptism in the Holy Spirit nine years ago if I had not tarried.

I wanted to be baptized. I researched, I read my Bible, I talked to my pastor and elders, and I prayed.  But it did not happen.  Then I went to a women's conference, and I just knew it would happen there.  But it did not.  I came home upset, angry and disappointed because I felt let down by the ladies I went with and by God.  I went to church that Sunday night and when the service ended I went to the altar. 

I was there for what seemed like an eternity.  I prayed.  I cried.  But I did not want to leave until I met God at that altar.  Everyone else had left except five others who stayed to pray through with me.  The others had gone on to a sundae social.  But I stayed on my knees.  One of the ladies finally knelt next to me and shared a vision she had with me.  Her vision was a child lost, looking everywhere for her father - going to and from, left and right.  And the Father said "I am right in front of you.  Run into my arms.  I have never left; I am always here."  The Lord wants you to crawl in His lap and fill you with His love - surround you.  Come freely into His arms.

After she walked away, there was a peace that came over me.  I received the baptism with evidence in speaking in tongues that night.  And I learned that I did not have to do or go anywhere special to meet with Jesus.  All I had to do was tarry.  All I had to do was wait and be patient.  God handled the rest.

I waited patiently for the Lord; 

he turned to me and heard my cry.

"He lifted me out of the slimy pit,

out of the mud and mire; 

he set my feet on a rock

and gave me a firm place to stand. 

He put a new song in my mouth,

a hymn of praise to our God.

Many will see and fear

and put their trust in the Lord."

(Psalm 40:1-3)

It is hard to express how thankful I am to God for this gift or to those who were willing to tarry with me. Last night I read a footnote from my Life Application Bible for Acts 1:15-26.  During these verses the apostles were waiting for God's response to who should replace Judas.  The footnote says,

While the apostles waited, they were doing what they could - praying, seeking God's guidance and getting organized.  Waiting for God to work does not mean sitting around doing nothing.  We must do what we can, as long as we don't run ahead of God.

Sometimes it is good to tarry.

My do it myself...

My do it myself - those were words that I used as a child.  I was independent even then.  I was not one to ask for help or to easily accept it.  I am still that way today.  Knowing that has led me to the lessons I learned in the last two weeks.

Two weeks ago, I injured my back, of all things, picking up a half full water bottle.  These weeks have been a lesson in patience.  Patience with myself and patience with others.  I have had to have patience with myself as my life has had to slow down.  You would not know it by looking at me but I am a very active person.  During this time I have had to take time off from work, my treadmill thinks I have forgotten about it, and things have gotten a little messy.  But I have had to learn to say "Oh well."  I need to recover, not do more damage.  I need to be patient so my recovery is weeks not months.  I have to have patience with myself knowing and doing what I need t do to recover.  I have to take the time to vary my activity, remember to take Aleve, use the icepack several times a day and ride the twenty minutes, one-way, to my chiropractor.

That last one leads me to my other lesson - patience with others.  It is easier for me to ask for help from God than it is for me to ask for help from others.  In Matthew 7:7-8 Jesus says

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; know and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

I know that this is true.  I know my Father wants to give me what I need and many times what I want, but I have to have the faith to ask, seek and knock.  I have learned that I have to do that with my earthly father, mother and all those who surround me.  I need to know my limits, I need to share my limits, and I need to ask and seek help to compensate for those limits.  

My students asked me why I was gone and as a private person I did not want to share, but I try to always be honest with them.  So I told them what I had done and what I was going through.  The next thing I knew, three students walked through my classroom door, laid hands on me and prayed.  How humbling and how awesome that my students cared enough to take their time to find me and pray for me.  Without being patient to take the time to share with them when they stopped me to inquire, I would not have had that encouraging, joyful experience.  God had not healed me physically through that prayer (even though I know He could) but I believe God had His reasons.

I have also had to have patience as I have had to ask and seek help.  I have not driven (except two short times) since this happened.  That means I am dependent on someone to take me to work, the doctor, the store, etc.  I have to ask someone to pick things up that are too low or too heavy.  It is humbling to have a student chew you out because you bent down to pick up a single piece of paper from a bottom drawer.  She ended by saying, Ms D all you had to do was ask.  That's all I have to do.  All I have to do is ask - ask my heavenly Father and ask my earthly family and friends.

I need to remember Paul's outlook on his weakness because the same is true for me.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." (2 Corinthians 12:9)

I know that my injury is nothing compared to what others go through daily.  But I also know that God can teach me even through this minor speed bump. I am grateful and humbled by the love, caring and help I have received.  I have learned that "my do it myself" is not a good philosophy to have or use. I guess my philosophy should be "my do it with help." 

God is faithful...

This is not what I had intended my next post to be, but God is faithful and I wanted to share the latest He has done for me.  

A year ago I went to some Financial Peace University classes.  It is embarrassing to say, but I have credit card debt.  I have been working toward paying it off and I have been practicing Dave Ramsey's envelope system for the last year to keep from going further into debt.  I faithfully go to the bank every month and get out my cash for the month and divide up the money and when it runs out it runs out. 

I am an animal person.  My animals are a big part of my life and I take the responsibility of their care seriously.  Today, I received an unexpected call asking me to stop by the pet store to pick up flea control products on my way home from uptown.  I shop for my animals supplies at the beginning of the month and their envelope is usually empty after the first week.  I knew they needed supplies and I went to the store and picked out what they needed.  I stood in line going over in my mind where I could pull the money from.  When I got to the cash register, I planned to write a check and move money from savings when I got home.  

But the Bible says,

And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)

God met my needs tonight!  The cashier asked my for my store discount card.  I keep it in the "pet supply" envelope.  When I opened up the envelope, to get my card out there were two $50 bills behind the card.  I was able to pay for the supplies without having to be 'creative.'  

I forgot that when I was going over my budget at the beginning of the month that I had some extra money to use.  Most went to pay down my debt, but I put some away in the pet envelope for some reason (I don't remember why now).  I forgot the money was there.  I was amazed tonight to find it there.  I was amazed that God knew what my needs would be at the beginning of the month and not only did He supply the money but He also gave me the foresight to set it aside. 

God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful. (1 Corinthians 1:9)

 It may seem frivolous to some, but God was faithful to me tonight.  He allowed me to get what I needed to care for my pets and continue to stay on track financially.  Thank you Lord Jesus!
 

 

My Testimony...

The first time I remember saying the sinner's prayer was when I was 3 or 4 years old.  I don't remember the exact age because it was at a time when dates and times were not important to me.  I was staying at my grandmother's house and one of my cousins led me through the prayer to ask Jesus into my heart as I said my nightly prayers.  Some may say that that was not at an age to make that decision or to truly understand what I was doing, but it was a decision that I have never regretted or deviated from.  Saying that, I had a reason to believe from very early in my life.

During the last two weeks in class we have been talking about healing.  The two chapters are "Sickness, Death, and God's Response" and "Fulfillment of the Promise of Divine Healing."  I tell you this because it takes me back to the testimony I have to share.  One of the lines in our text (Introduction to Pentecostal Doctrine) says "we can conclude that 'Verify, then testify' is a good path to follow."  My healing was verified many years ago, so now I will testify.

Something was not right when I began walking - my feet turned in.  I had difficulty standing without holding on to something and walking was impossible.  My brother and I were living with my grandmother and aunt while my parents moved our household across country.  My grandmother and aunt took me to the doctor to find out that I had a condition that could only possibly be treated through years or a lifetime of wearing full leg braces.  

I strapped the braces on each day.  But at the first chance my family had, they took me to church.  The elders of the church prayed for me.  They prayed until God answered that prayer.  They prayed until I was completely healed.  I was healed within three months.  Not three years! Not a lifetime! I was healed and free of my leg braces.

The healing that God did for me was always in the back of my mind, but He brought it to the front when I was a senior in high school.  During that year, I met a coworker of my mom who had the same condition.  She still had to cope with the condition.  And cope she did.  She pushed a baby stroller for support.  God reminded me at that point about the healing He had done in my life.

I know that God is the great physician.  In Exodus 15:26, God proclaims, "I am the Lord, who heals you."  I stand before the world today because He is the Lord and He healed me.

First Statement of Truth

I belong to a church that stands on 16 Statements of Fundamental Truths.  I believe that all 16 are important and it gives me comfort to see in black and white where my church takes a stand.

The first truth (and one that I take great comfort in) is 

The Scriptures, both Old and New Testament, are verbally inspired by God and are the revelation of God to man, the infallible, authoritative rule of faith and conduct. (based on 2 Timothy 3:15-17, 1 Thessalonians 2:13, and 2 Peter 1:21)

 God inspired the words.  He gave the thoughts and words in the Bible to man to write down.  

He thought enough about me to give me encouragement, hope, love, rules, and boundaries in His written word.  He thought enough to give me a sword when I have to do battle (Ephesians 6:17) and hope when I am walking through a valley (Psalm 23).  Some days what gets me through is to remember that God says in His word that He has plans for me (Jeremiah 29:11).  To know that everything occurs for a season (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8), not a lifetime, gives me encouragement for the future.  

I find comfort in the examples God gives us in His word.  Comfort that He was there for those mentioned and that He will be there for me.  He gave examples of how to live and consequences for not following them.  He shows how He follows through with those consequences.  I find comfort that He will do the same for me since "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever" (Hebrews 13:8). 

It All Begins Here...

Almost two years ago, I sat out on a new journey in life.  It was started to build my relationship with God and to make me more confident and bold in what He has for me to do.

As part of my studies, I have been required to complete an outside project.  I have taught several studies, gone on a mission trip, started a non-profit business to raise money for mission trips, and help start a community outreach program in my church.  This quarter I have decided to venture into a new world and expand my horizon, so to speak, by writing this blog.

The words you will find here are my thoughts as I study, read my Bible, attend my study group, and continue on this journey.  As a teacher, I know that in order to grow you have to be challenged.  So I invite you to respond to my thoughts.  I invite you to challenge me.  I invite you to share this journey with me.